mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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