I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Randomize
