LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
