You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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