oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
