yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
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