I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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