C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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