She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize