Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer

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(669): View more from California

I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"

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(469): View more from Texas

Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee

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(480): View more from Arizona

Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?

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