You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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