i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
