This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
