As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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