You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
