so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
