I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
