need another drink. this is the easiest way
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
