How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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