do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Randomize
