Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Randomize
