garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
