If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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