That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
