party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize
