Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
