Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
