Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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