I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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