I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I can tuck mytits in my pants
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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