You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
