Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
