Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
