Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
