I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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