I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Randomize
