There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize