Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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