Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Randomize
