Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
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