Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
