i think i have two assholes
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
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