Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
