Having a random hookup so left but love u
how can u be prego again
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
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