So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
