Im at strip club and am horny
look no pants
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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