i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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