every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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