Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
