Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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