Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
