My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize